Bottom line. Briana DeJesus: PROOF Her Boyfriend Got Another Girl Pregnant Revealed He can have an opinion about her but its absurd to be mad at her because they created a baby. So, youre wondering what is it about her that he is willing to commit himself and give his all to her. If she does your boyfriend will deal with the aftermath of having sex without a condom. Hed be out the door on you as well. Its still good advice if the letter his fake, actually, since there certainly are people in this situation. caitie_didnt What should I do if my boyfriend got another woman pregnant but - Quora I find it enjoyable to do because it makes him happy, and it turns me on to get him so turned on. I GOT ANOTHER GIRL PREGNANT PRANK ON GIRLFRIEND! (GONE WRONG) | We female I agree that using a condom (even when she was on the Pill) would not have necessarily meant she wouldnt have gotten pregnant. Woah. But she can also at any time change her mind and he has no recourse. Also who goes around talking about how he cant stand the mother of his child? Its such a heated issue, because everyone knows someone that has some sort of baby-mama-drama on one side or the other. And the children are either damned or murdered. BTW, believe it or not, I usually agree with the majority of the commenters here. You add nothing to the conversation but name-calling. Its easy to think the guy is a scumbag for not wanting to be a dad. Really, people. Gain some maturity and realize that you have no part in this decision, shes decided to keep the baby, shes the one who will be carrying the baby, raising the baby, etc Grow up LW and dump him. His baby momma, the woman he claims he doesnt love and doesnt want to be with, is threatening to harm herself and the baby if he doesnt be with her. But what can I do? All Im advocating is the addition of a requirement that the woman has made a good-faith effort to contact the father-to-be once she found out that she was pregnant and that he didnt opt out of support. April 10, 2012, 10:20 pm. If it is his child, he owes the child at least something. Everything is he: He is in love with you, so in love that he humped another woman; so in love that he wanted to kill a baby to be with you. How does your law make this fair? April 9, 2012, 5:48 pm. i completely agree, it is both parties responsibilities to make sure they are preventing pregnancy AND stds. Addie Pray I think, Chuck, what she meant was that no one is forcing these men to impregnate strangers. Seriously, cry me a river you ignorant #**>##!!! I know one 40yr old lady who got pregnant after having her tubes tied. However, hey, feel free to pretend its still 2000 BC. Remember awhile back there was the letter about the girl who had an abortion and was scared to tell her bf because he was anti-abortion. I would like to also say, we dont know that shes trapping him. Your constant blatant disregard for others is increasingly more and more shocking Plus it is only the heteros that are so steadfast and determined to keep fucking people like me over and over All the while, claiming they want smaller government Then get the FUCK out of my bedroom and out of my fucking life. Baby, our apartment isnt big enough for a baby. I know Im stretching here, but Being on the Pill is akin to saying that youre not interested in having children, so I think its not completely invalid for him to assume she wasnt ready to have children, and to be angry when he ends up being forced into fatherhood.. Is that pretty much it? But in cases where a woman chooses to bear a child against the wishes of the father, the reciprocal obligation is less concrete. wendy, i love you for leaving the crazies to us! When we got back together we had a lot of trust issues and found it hard to forgive one another. Regret can feel even worse than heartbreak. I love the argument that the women receiving child support are just sipping margaritas all day while getting mani/pedis on this income. Dream about Boyfriend Got Another Girl Pregnant indicates spiritual renewal and healing. April 10, 2012, 7:23 pm. You are an entitled, awful, C.U.N.T for even THINKING that you have an opinion on what this woman does with her pregnancy. Theres a fun scenario. Women have two- before sex, and after they find out theyre pregnant. I thought you were disputing the comments about it being not that contagious by disclosing that you were HIV positive. (Well assume she is pro life for non religious reasons because Im not sure why a religious person would be fine with banging after two minutes thats a whole other can of worms). Youre wondering if he will marry her. Its that men should have as much of a say in whether they want to opt into support as do women. When he didnt come chasing after you when you moved you knew it was over and done with. Their choice, honey. His character and judgment are awful. 5 Ways To Deal When Your Ex Is Dating Someone New - Bustle You are in a relationship where you are the one responsible for everything. Everyone in this situation sounds like they belong on Jerry Springer. November 19, 2012, 3:02 pm. Your are putting words into peoples mouths. Some said he deserved the label because he exposed the LW to STDs. bittergaymark I think the LW and her ex would do better to break up for good. Women why do we allow men to sleep with us while they are drunk again..my god.I wont say dont continue your relationship but it will be hard. That way you will know things like what you both agree to do if she gets preggers, and how soon you jettison him if he goes and has sex with someone else ad knocks her up. April 9, 2012, 6:39 pm, Oh, please. They like to entrap men, too. And hopefully people begin to realize that just taking the pill isnt an absolute gurantee that you wont make a baby. April 9, 2012, 11:00 am. April 9, 2012, 5:57 pm. You and the baby are the victims. Ill never understand the chicks who want to blame/curse/fight the other woman like the dude has no part in the whole mess. Its been done and will continue to be done, as long as accidents, divorce, and death happen. Youre right, what your life has become isnt fair- to anyone involved. lets_be_honest If you dont find the info you need in this column, please visit the Dear Wendy archives or the forums (you can even start your own thread), do a search in the search bar, or submit a question for advice at wendy(AT)dearwendy.com. Child support is, indeed, a lottery win for women, by which they compel men who had nothing to do with their lifestyle choices to support their lifestyle choices in the manner to which they have become accustomed. Thanks for listening to me. I dont think hes scum based on this either. April 10, 2012, 10:14 pm, if a man has sex with a woman, they should be prepared to pay dearly for it for the rest of their lives. Not me. Because the bf in question was part of the creation of the child. I think what you are trying to explain are the two types of custodyover the person and over decision making for the person. Is it fair the the woman has to be the one to undergo a surgical, often time traumatic procedure when a man can just move and disappear? CONSTANTLY. Respect her decision. Really stupid. I do not think he has a duty to be there for the child he never wanted and made it known he did not want to have with time to do something about it. Or maybe you feel like youre trapped between a rock and a hard place. having sex with someone you dont know that well. April 9, 2012, 7:03 pm, Wait, whoops, no. Shutterstock. Of course we have a right to an opinion, even if our opinion is that dirty sluts shouldnt breed. But then, I guess I like giving people the benefit of the doubt. You may not agree with it, but the laws are such that he is obligated to raise the possible resulting child and/or pay for that child for a couple of decades, if she decides not to terminate the pregnancy. Probably a creationist, from what you know about biological science. That is called deception. This letter is written by someone who wasnt even involved in the conception of the child, so I dont believe there can be an objective reading of the circumstances. You, Chuck, seem to think that this means that all women do that. Would you tell the parents that you would gladly pay for the funeral, but you want nothing else to do with what happened, and that you are going to go live your life like nothing did? Everyone knows it. SpaceySteph And not because he deserved it for having possibly unprotected sex. April 10, 2012, 7:21 pm. April 9, 2012, 9:55 am. Im guessing that shes in the UK or Ireland, or perhaps New England. If you want to hold this poor man responsible for some child some women decided to create, thats just mean and patriarchal crap. How many times have we read articles like that and think to ourselves couldnt you have just left the baby with family or at the hospital rather than kill it.. They way the *LW* is painting the picture here of how she and her bf are treating the unborn child is unfair to the child and is why people are reacting the way they are. Does that make him an asshole? I try t,o help because I remember when I was young. ESSENCE.com is part of ESSENCE Communications, Inc. I mean, he loved the baby mama enough to get erected & to bang her & to just release evrything to make her pregnant, & what the fuck am I thinking?!?!? And he has agreed to support the child financially. Why do you assume everything is so laid back though? Weird question. We met up again and my family grew fond of him finally. Nothing about that makes him a bad person. Of course my opinion of her is based on the story he is telling you. I have a really hard time believing that this guy who hates this woman and wants nothing to do with this child had a civil conversation with the baby mom discussing their options, while stating his preference for an abortion. A condoms like 50 cents. Males who have been RAPED still have to pay child support. These two ideas cannot be simultaneously true. We dont even know that this other woman told the bf that she is pregnant. He could be upset (and who wouldnt be) if he didnt want it but she was keeping it anyway. We should use it more often. That is what passes for reality in your world? Even people who do want to have one often suffer from some kind of depression or at least sadness. The letter implies that the only protection used was the birth control. And finally , yes, I do think he should have some right to what happens to that pregnancy, and yes I do think that trapping someone by getting pregnant is repulsive, and so yes, I can understand his anger at the woman if that is what is happening. Regardless of the law which I think is enforced far more often than not it seems wrong to me to argue that men have no control over whether a child is born but are legally bound to pay child support, whereas women can end the pregnancy or put the child up for adoption. April 9, 2012, 10:46 am, Im not even sure how to address this letter, so I guess step by step is a good way to go. Some of the best advice my mom ever gave me way back in the day was Listen. While We Were on a Break, He Got His Ex Pregnant. Now I'm - The Root You seem too whiny for most womens taste. Having the right to do something OBVIOUSLY doesnt mean its always a good idea. iseeshiny August 24, 2019, 2:54 pm. According to DeCrow, he shouldnt even have to pay child support, because thats fundamentally unfair. If its not easy, opt out of it. bittergaymark Believe it or not, but a bedpartner with a scintillating personality is not a prerequisite for the male orgasm: its possible to have and enjoy sex with somebody who you nevertheless regard as entirely obnoxious and devoid of LTR potential. And dont worry, my sons will have the good sense to stay away from your daughters. The next day I text her that we can give it another chance, but she insisted she was not feeling the same . Part of the agreement was they he was to never have any contact with the child. Chuck Pelto Here 13 common reasons guys start missing and try to go back to their ex. If you were instrumental in the making of the child congratulations it is yours. Will he react the same? Why Your Ex Boyfriend Contacts You When Hes In Another Relationship She got pregnant. I chose to have a baby. My Spidey sense is tingling that this could be a fake. Im not sure why you think this woman is trying to trap your boyfriend unless there are other details you didnt provide. Increasingly, more and more, these letters just simply disgust me. Again, no. 99% of women would not blame the other woman, baselessly accuse her of trying to trap her bf, be angry that someone she has no relationship with has chosen not have an abortion per their wishes, treat this woman as if she is solely responsible for child she only helped to conceive. He does have a responsibility towards this baby, whether he likes it or not. She didnt sneak up in the dark of the night and steal his seed and turkey baste herself, Chuck. Now this is really petty, but I'm planning to post a picture of me and my boyfriend for her to see. If it is hers you bet she supports it. The woman can choose to abort the baby, even in the event the father desperately wants it, and is willing to raise and support it himself. And as an adult who isnt ready to have children, either, I can empathize with his decision. But if you are uninterested in a relationship with him because of his newfound drama then walk away sister. So, hey, lets jump on him and discuss how vile he is because he didnt take measures to avoid it (and lets do so without any actual proof that he didnt wear a condom, that she wasnt on the pill, and so on). Oh, may be you should marry him and fantasize what kind of fun he is having whenever hes late coming home, or fearful he would leave you when you, like that woman, passed 40; or be told to get rid of your baby who is inconvenient to him. Niven and Pournelle, Lucifers Hammer]. What would you tell your girlfriend or sister if they were in the same situation is always a good go-to. I know it is hard since you love this guy to see how reprehensible he is. He doesnt have to have a romantic relatioship with her, but if she keeps the baby, and IF he is a real man, then this woman will be in his life for the rest of his, as the child is her child as well as his. April 9, 2012, 12:24 pm. You are the one who is keeping this rollercoaster of a relationship going with him. I wouldnt consider him a scumbag for asking her to consider abortion. 60+ years on this ball-o-dirt and witnessing the madness going on around this place, as well as being an honest-to-God Christian. Then, fine; but you need to consider the possibility of having to deal with this malarkey for the rest of the time you and your boyfriend are together. Life is unfair. Aim for the face. Honestly, why would you want to put yourself in a permanent relationship who a) has encouraged his baby mommy to abort the child for the sake of convenience and 2) who has sex with people he cannot stand? The sex was good. And as far as I can tell, it happens an awful lot. Not your body, not your choice. This is why homosexual couples have to adopt. Its not a gender-based law. Our resident male troll is back and defending his gender. bittergaymark Personally, it doesnt sound like shes trying to trap your untrappable boyfriend into a relationship YOU are trying to trap him, or get rid of him, by telling him he should stay with her because its his kid (and then you go around calling her (the mother of your BFs child) scoat and such very classy)! Its very unfair. That means from a mental, obvious, and circumstantial standpoint, the girl is at the disadvantage. Youre never going to persuade crazy, but other people reading can maybe read something interesting without getting too turned off by the insanity of one side. Thats fd. illinois obituaries 2020 . Have whatever sex you want. She is certain it is his. She isnt a woman he wants to be with his entire life. You shouldnt be following so closely behind someone that if they were to suddenly slam on their brakes you wouldnt be able to stop (for a billboard, for a kid running across the street, because theyre being dicks, ect). Any woman who, in a divorce, grants custody of the children to the father is an immature asshole, and any woman who spends her life in her career an allows the father to raise the children is an immature asshole, because, in each of those cases, the woman is just as guilty of abdicating the role of parent as the guy here would be, and in many of them, she also doesnt even provide financial support. Men get a say in abortions? , CatsMeow However, sure, something unexpected and life-altering happened to him, and hes upset, so surely hes an idiot. I mean, for starters, if I even had one unplanned baby while on the pill, Id probably not continue to use it. He can be one he better be one- and still be a loyal partner to you. But when it comes down to it, men have *zero* say in anything having to do with the child how it is raised, where it lives, etc. I think we can all agree that the safest thing for men to do is to simply masturbate alone, while wearing a condom. It was her choice. My husbands 2 month affair has ended with his girlfriend being pregnant Thats not the point here. Model Mustang. Iwannatalktosampson And be aware that nothing short of not having sex is 100% guaranteed to prevent pregnancy. Rachel, I have a child in the same situation. I mean, I know guys are suppose to stick up for guys, but come on.. No matter how many precautions you take, if a pregnancy occurs you have to accept that its because of what you did and accept full responsibility for your actions. Yes, its true it is past the point. What do you think happens to the fetus? Hi. Why should she abort the baby I mean come on. I Got Another Girl Pregnant Prank *WE BROKE UP SIGH* How about getting to know one another really well before having sex? Now that that lesson is over do you have any other questions? Especially since, had he been the woman and felt the same way, he would have quietly aborted the child without inviting half the scorn hes received here. Two are very small, less than six months. I dont think I have ever seen so many thumbs up on one post And it deserves them! He also lowkey blames me because I initiated the breakup. I dont think its necessarily fair. I appreciate the points youre trying to make. Hes an idiot either way. I think he was just really scared, and alot had changed in a really short matter of time. The only one who we know is expecting him to be a father is the letter writer. the thing is, he has a 4 yr old daughter. He has made it clear that he wants a pregnancy to be terminated. There is no child at conception very good. Only men-children would not use a condom in this situation. The law provides that the parent taking care of the child is entitled to support from the other parent. In other cases, receiving a text from an ex can immediately bring up feelings of annoyance, dread or even fear particularly if the relationship was a toxic and unhappy one that you want distance from. A woman who is raped is stuck with the agonizing choice of getting an abortion, or carrying a child to term. She may have just dumped his ass and now he wants to temporarily get back with LW and knows what to say. The waiter has no idea that she has a severe allergy to peanuts, so doesnt tell the kitchen to change gloves when preparing her meal. I must be in the minority because oral sex is a regular part of sex btw my husband and I and Id definitely miss it if it wasnt. SpaceySteph iseeshiny But still a good thing to have. She might not have been on the Pill, but that was a risk that he chose to take by having sex with someone he knew for two minutes without a condom. April 9, 2012, 12:23 pm. MOA, ASAP. He was broken up with her at that time, and had no agreement that they would get together in the future. We . I just dont see why thats ok but its not ok for the guy to essentially do the same thing but then have to pay. SpaceySteph After reading your comment, all I wanna say is, AfuckingMEN. Which, if youll recall, honey, was what we were discussing in the first place before you sidetracked us. If you know you absolutely dont want kids, do everything you can to prevent them. That a woman has a right to choose if she carries a child to term or not should nor mean that she has a right to choose how a man spends his money for the next 18 years. I have never heard anybody going through an unwanted pregnancy say they didnt take care. He had no more to do with the existence of this child then an architect who only provides half the blueprints has responsibility for the existence of the Pentagon. Steve, I dont think you should waste your energy getting so fired up about this. Where exactly do you live? How very astute of you to notice the fundamental difference between the genders. April 10, 2012, 9:40 pm. He didnt expect that to happen. iseeshiny landygirl We all know that going in. Fuck yes, he shouldnt have a choice in that. It pays and so do the provider of the sperm. Its none of your business. Yep. You dont honestly believe that logic that applies to one situation should be applied to all situations, do you? It is actually quite easy. Only it is the LW who seems intent on absolving the boyfriend from all responsibility saying furious. And you cant have conception without sperm. Scan this QR code to download the app now. IMO there are probably better ways to deal w/ the more egregious incidents of paternity fraud. So yes, if she is trying to trap him, he should be furious at her. pretty sure he is actually an extreme pro-lifer who is playing into his rhetoric backwards. I dont think you have the maturity to deal with this sort of complexity so I would peace out for the sake of everyone involved, especially the baby.
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