And I'm glad I did and she's glad she didn't. I wanted to let nature take its course. I broke down and started hitting my disgusting body that had done this. So it was, there was very, very little movement from the baby because I remembered first time round by that stage, you know, that the baby was quite big and it moved around a lot at a later scan. I feel empty and incomplete. These were said to be soft markers fo a range of trisomies, 2 of which were incompatible with life. My partner spent the weekend trying to convince me that things were OK. Sometimes women were told that the sonographer had found a 'marker' or sign of a chromosomal condition and had to wait for an amniocentesis to confirm the findings. Eventually, the midwife said to us very sweetly, "I think we should deliver the baby now." I didn't want to go through anymore scans. As I lay down, and the sonographer started, I could see there was something wrong. (See 'Resources'). Because, when you're angry with the world for dealing you such a shit time, you begin to hate the people who populate it. I felt I needed proof of what was wrong before I take such a huge decision and that I couldn't do it based on what someone had written on, on the paper. Within it are a number of recommendations for the communication of findings from ultrasounds. Originally I hadn't wanted to go down that road. It will take only 2 minutes to fill in. I agreed to an internal scan as the sonographer said we could get a better picture of what was happening. So we'd gone through the Down's syndrome or worse scare, we'd had conversations about what we would do, if it was confirmed that it was Down's syndrome or another syndrome, another sort of chromosome abnormality. I tried to keep positive. I was told this was common as my body and hormones still thought I was pregnant. So he went out for a walk. It seemed inconceivable that we would not be having a baby in May. For many other women, the 18-20 week scan was the point at which they discovered the baby had serious problems. You get extra care and monitoring as appropriate and baby is proactively treated. The doctor wanted to do another blood test to confirm a significant drop in my hormone levels. And with each one we had to have the same conversations. And the local hospital wanted to send us off to the regional hospital to actually confirm that, and were not really prepared to say at that time that there was something very seriously wrong. She didn't say at the time that it was a major problem or that it was something to watch out for. But at the 20 week scan, which was on a Wednesday, we saw the nurse at the local hospital, the sonographer, and she did a scan and she found that the femur length was quite short in the, in the fetus. I didn't sleep that night I don't think. I think they perhaps could have done, if they had looked a bit closely. Where we have identified any third party copyright information you will need to obtain permission from the copyright holders concerned. He was tiny, perfect and a Down's syndrome baby. Wishing to be anywhere, but here being told the same agonising truth over and over again. I was wondering if anyone has been is this situation and can give me a glimmer of hope. I want to be happy again. And of course some other measurements she needed to take like the width of the skull, which she couldn't take because the fetus was in the wrong position. To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account. Anyway we went in for the meeting with the consultant on this particular time, and we'd got to, I was 30 weeks pregnant by then. My son's congenital heart defect was detected at the 20 week scan and he had 2 other markers, no . Good luck has not come easily over the past few years. By the time I left the hospital, I was in shock. I tried to show him the notes and the photos. So we decided to book an early 10 week private scan. It's, I mean you can't tell from these scans what you're looking at really, but I remember thinking, 'it just doesn't look quite right' or something, but I didn't give it much thought. 15/02/2014 08:02. See more information about the 20-week ultrasound scan. And I remember, the first thing I remember when something might be wrong, was I saw, I finally, we finally saw an image of the skull on the screen, and there appeared to be a sort of black hole shape in the middle. Again the legs were quite twisted, they said that the baby's sternum was very short - things weren't in proportion you know - the head was quite large, the neck was very thick, there wasn't really like a neck as such it was just things were kind of - there were lots of things that obviously the consultant could see that we weren't aware of. We walked all the way home. What would we like to do with the body? The scan will find about half (50%) of those babies who have heart defects. And before they gave me any of the results she asked a colleague to come and told me she wanted to check something, with a colleague, and by then I was getting very concerned because I'd never had that happen before. Tears started to roll down my face. And at that point I don't think we, I don't think we realised that there might have to be a decision, because we'd talked about it with, with Down's and the other possible problems, but at this point it was, well okay what can be done to fix the problem - because yes the heart's not developing properly but there must be something we can do. I did think it was a bit strange that she wasn't talking, and then she sort of said, 'Oh, I think there's a problem. If an abnormality is confirmed or suspected, referral is usually required, although some obvious major fetal abnormalities, such as anencephaly, may not require a second opinion (this should be decided by local guidelines). [Husband] couldn't make it. Sometimes women were told that the sonographer had found a 'marker' or sign of a chromosomal condition and had to wait for an amniocentesis to confirm the findings. The sonographer will be able to tell you the results of the scan at the time. She describes having to make a momentous decision very quickly, and the ferment of relief, guilt and grief that followed, Original reporting and incisive analysis, direct from the Guardian every morning. I hadn't thought about the mechanics of such a late termination, but had assumed it would mean some kind of operation. In some cases concerns in utero fix themselves sometimes needs treatment. Living in this world must be unbearable for them. All my instincts were to protect my belly, yet here I was allowing someone to stick a huge needle into it. She didn't want to see the baby. Why me and not you, you bastard? My belly was growing and I was feeling great. Intellectually, I knew this was not the case. I remember thinking, 'Gosh' I now know it was a girl, I didn't know that then, that, 'She looks just like her brother'. I couldn't have the added responsibility for changing his mind. That's fine. We'd just spent some time away on a, on a summer holiday and come back expecting to have this scan and be told, 'All fine. Being generous and kind generally happens only when you're happy. At first the closeness came through a sense of guilt. An appointment should be arranged as soon as possible and ideally within three working days. I didn't have a clue. I returned to be told they wanted to scan me again, another internal to see exactly what was happening. Which she reassured us that she'd be absolutely fine, this was a one-off. On the third day, we got a phone call. We would terminate the pregnancy. As I lay down, and the sonographer started, I could see there was something wrong. I was disgusted - disgusted that such a tablet existed, let alone that I should have to take it. I was told they needed to do a blood test to get a bench mark of my hormone levels. And she said that, you know, as the, if the baby did develop further there would probably be other problems with internal organs that weren't really that visible at that stage. It was horrible. There, I would give birth. Which is what I'd seen. It took 20 minutes to push him out. The screen may be directly facing them or at an angle. You've had a scan, you've had the blood tests, you've been good. After she had taken all the measurements, the sonographer told us that she was concerned with the length of the baby's limbs in relation to the head. All the hopes, dreams, and plans we made with our little bumps has been taken away from us. I couldn't work out what was taking so long and put it down to the doctor being young and inexperienced. We've got the same battle scars. I don't know how we got through the next couple of days. And I felt like a murderer. At which point they turned round and said, 'Well, there is something very seriously wrong with the baby, we don't know exactly what, but you do need to have a more in-depth scan at your regional hospital to find out the detail'. We don't know, but it's not looking good'. Try to relax and take it easy. The scan will look in detail at your babys bones, heart, brain, spinal cord, face, kidneys and abdomen. That they could have spotted something, or not? And she sort of got up and walked out of the room and called someone in. It is extremely rare for these pregnancies to reach term as they typically spontaneously miscarry early in pregnancy. This is not what I imagined pregnancy to feel like', Baby Loss Awareness Week - Voice Five - Bryony Seabrook. Is it the same scan or is it the same equipment? To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account. Where we were living then at the time you only had a scan at 20 weeks. Some of the other conditions, such as heart defects, are more difficult to see. Some stories I hear are amazing! And I know I can't hurry up the process of grieving. I pray it's just her heart but I can't see anything else is wrong as I have been scanned by a consultant since I was 14 weeks and every time he has said everything looks okay and she is growing consistently. I give obsessively to charity, especially those linked to sick children. Registered office: Nicholas House, 3 Laurence Pountney Hill, London, EC4R 0BB. Next most likely is that baby doesn't co-operate and they can't see some parts of anatomy and call you back 2 weeks later just because they couldn't see (i had this but because twin pregnancy I was due to be scanned 2 weeks later anyway). But she told us, she told us, she gave us some more detail, she said, 'There's this, there's a big gap in the brain where there shouldn't be'. And then I can't remember an awful lot more about that scan apart from that feeling of searching of how to react in an unknown situation - your brain's kind of trying to work out what to say, what to do, but I had no idea what to say or what to do and I think my first thought was, does that mean our first daughter's okay? Any delay in receiving more information about the abnormality and its implications will be distressing for women and this should be acknowledged. But everything seemed fine and we'd been sitting waiting to see the consultant, and I'd had an examination on the bed. Saturday came. It was probably all right but hadn't had any fluid in it at the moment. The consultant had said it wouldn't be like a normal delivery. The hormone levels had dropped, but they wanted to scan me again. And that was a terrible moment to be sort of hanging on, waiting. Enough for two weeks after he had been cremated. And the first few things they said it didn't sound as thing, as though things were terribly wrong. I'm trying to understand because I haven't seen a 3-D scan, what it tells the parents? Just that really! Then I picked myself up. So it was just, we were coming up to the 20-week scan and I was just getting more relaxed, just actually starting to look at maybe baby catalogues or, you know, going down the baby aisle at the shops, which I'd always avoided. But he was wrong. And so began the most bizarre day of my life. Check benefits and financial support you can get, Find out about the Energy Bills Support Scheme, NHS fetal anomaly screening programme (FASP), Screening tests for you and your baby (STFYAYB), nationalarchives.gov.uk/doc/open-government-licence/version/3, more information and details of support groups. Likely to have serious medical problems all his life. Some say this estimate is really below the reality, and the out-of-pocket average costs are higher. So once again we were right back down, really no, really not knowing what to expect. I had hope that the little bumps inside me were fighting just as much as I was to stay with me. I just feel very unlucky. And I can just remember flashing a look at you as if to say, 'Have I made a mistake here somewhere? As though I went power mad for a week, killing my innocent unborn child, and now I am tainted for ever. The baby was kicking so hard that I began to believe him. But it is a soft marker for Edwards' syndrome. The thing that I have a very strong memory of is this child's face in amazing detail. Cardiac surgery can do some amazing things. I swallowed the tablet and we left the building. Soon, the doctor came and inserted the tablets that would induce labour. 80 percent of my pregnancies have ended in death and I felt like they were telling me those babies didn't matter. We were bound to each other because of the blood that was on both our hands. Others, including those who had been given leaflets to read about the scan beforehand as well as some who were health professionals, said that they had been nave about the 20-week scan. Maybe. It was sick. I was young, I didn't need one. We'd sort of put those discussions to the back of our mind, and then all of a sudden there are other abnormalities so yeah it was a bit a bit of a shocker [laughs]. From losing my dad to his battle with cancer, to then having to face another battle with cancer and my mum; thankfully she pulled though. Some people had underestimated how serious any abnormality found at this stage could be for the baby. The clinic advised a follow up scan the week after, to check on progress and to see what to do next. I had my little leaflet, printed off leaflet about choroid plexus cysts. For example, you may be offered further tests that have a risk of miscarriage. 2022. This scan takes place between 18 weeks and 20 weeks 6 days of pregnancy and is commonly called the 20-week scan. I felt more informed, and I felt that that was what I needed in my head to see you know, that I've got to accept now that this, all these things are real on the screen and this was really my baby that's suffering all these things [sighs], but I was sad as well. Reading individual, real-life experiences can be a helpful resource, but it is never a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment from a qualified health care provider. I hated my body and hated every feeling I was having. Let a mum know you're thinking of them send one of our personalised Mother's Day cards today, Home Actually you could tell from the brain development as he scanned up through the chambers of the brain, that one quarter of the brain, one chamber was not evident. 'Soft markers'. We didn't name him. But before he could speak, he, too, had broken down. My partner really wanted me to, and by that time I had no sense of what was right or what I should do. b>Bad news at 20 week scan. For instance a couple who knew their baby was 'on the small size' were told he was fine at the 18-20 week scan, but discovered at 32 weeks that he had microcephaly. We needed closure, to allow us to grieve properly. I was sent home with a leaflet, strong painkillers and two types of antibiotics. How was that scan different from the dating scan? Possibly with hindsight we could have been more worried about it, but was probably a good thing we weren't, because we weren't worried about anything basically. He started to scan me with a cold expression, then told me, "it didn't look good" and that "my womb looked raggedy". I remember thinking, 'that doesn't look quite right'. Has anyone been told the sex incorrectly at their 20 week scan? To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account. . It is essential that all practitioners performing fetal anomaly ultrasound screening should be trained to communicate abnormal findings to women, as such information is likely to have significant emotional impact. We both thought we would like some good to come out of this horrible experience, so wanted to talk to somebody about the possibility of using the body for research purposes. The 18 -20 week fetal anomaly scan is a watershed in most pregnancies because for the majority of women it will be the last time they are scanned before giving birth. And nothing prepares you at all. Well, at the regional hospital it was a 3-D scan. Despite this new discovery, the sonographer was still concerned. I was another one who did get bad news at the 20 week scan. After half an hour of lying on the bed, I was starting to get nervous, but was excited to find out that the baby would be a boy and that I could see his little heart beating strongly. I wrote a few things down last night when we were trying to go over things, just to remind myself. To view this licence, visit nationalarchives.gov.uk/doc/open-government-licence/version/3 or write to the Information Policy Team, The National Archives, Kew, London TW9 4DU, or email: psi@nationalarchives.gov.uk. This scan takes place between 18 weeks and 20 weeks 6 days of pregnancy and is commonly called the 20-week scan. Spina bifida can usually be seen clearly on a scan and of those babies who have this condition, around 9 out of 10 (90%) will be detected. You could see her face, and the major aspect that was, that was the indication of what was wrong was the thickening at the back of the neck in this instance, which, when you're looking at a fetus is, you know, sort of half a centimetre thicker or not is completely immaterial to me, and would look like a completely normal neck, but from the point of view of the consultant was severely abnormal. And they took me into another room. In this information, the word we refers to the NHS service that provides screening. I was sat on the sofa working, my son was at nursery and my partner was in the bath. Although the anomaly scan is often called a 20-week scan, you may have it any time between 18 and 22 weeks, although it's usually done between 18 and 20 weeks. It was real. The same anxious wait for a little, pathetic cry. I had no issues at my 20wk scan with DD - and neither did any of my antenatal group (9 mums). Like many things, the theory is very different from the reality. Some things can be seen more clearly than others. We talked about the different sorts of pain relief I could have and I opted for a morphine drip, which I could control. So I sort of went home quite, fairly kind of happy and I, at, at this point I hadn't any idea things could go wrong anyway. Some people we talked to had not had a 18-20-week scan, either because their babies' abnormalities had been detected by earlier . Most scans show that babies seem to be developing as expected, and none of the 11 conditions are found. And, faced with feeling sorry for myself or feeling sorry for my child, I know which I'd choose. I faced another internal scan where I began to feel helpless and alone. I thought I was going to burst into tears. So I suppose from that aspect, mind you having not been told that or sitting there, I wouldn't have thought necessarily that was odd. I couldn't bring myself to push. He felt doing more blood tests would only cause me more discomfort and false hope. He wanted to talk about it, but I didn't. I wasn't unduly worried at all. 20 week scans look for 11 different anomalies as a rule, however, indicators (markers) are not terribly reliable and in all the literature I found, the targets set for stonographers look like they only pick up around 50% or less of these variants. By my own hand, I had to end the pregnancy. And I wish that I'd been told at that point, that somebody had actually turned round to me and said, 'Look, I'm sorry, but I think there's something very wrong.
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